Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
