The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
