This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
Randomize
