Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
Boobs speak an international language.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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