When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Randomize
