i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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