I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
