My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
