yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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