I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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