I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Be still, my beating vagina.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
