I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
Randomize
