maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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