I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
How does one acquire holy water?
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Randomize
