it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
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