I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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