did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
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