I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
Randomize
