i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
