Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
