it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
