WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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