im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
