Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize