i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
