If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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