My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
