Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Randomize
