So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
