He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
