I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
You dont lie about slip and slides
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
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