I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize