she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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