I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
