Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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