You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize