pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
