she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
