I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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