you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Randomize
