then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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