Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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