I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
