He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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