We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Your cock deserves a montage
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Randomize
