Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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