how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
he fucked my hip out of place.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
Randomize
