Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
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