I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Randomize
