Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Randomize
