i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Randomize